i think you’re lying. i think you wanted to spend time with wifey. i think, you think, that i’m a waste of time. and i think you’re full of shit. but i like your smile…
Archive for June, 2009
think i’m better now.
and i can’t believe i went protected for this sh!t. back on as of today…
will need to ween myself away from this… slowly. so as not to cause concern.
armour back in place. WORD!
there’s this one episode of That 70’s Show where Hyde is teaching Jackie how to appropriately respond in any given situation, and he informs her that she just needs to choose 1 of the following 3 responses–
it’s cool…
good to know…
whatever…
(i’m still trying to decide which one i like best)
mostly, for making me hope. seriously, i’m the one that chickens out. that runs. course, you said you had no choice. that you would be here, if you could. i don’t know if i even believe you. men lie. life seems to keep reminding me of that little detail. with you, i had turned a deaf ear. with you, i thought it was safe to hope. how fucking stupid of me… to remove my armour. Sun Tzu is surely mocking me… loser.
throat is sore. or is it just allergies? i don’t want to be sick this week. it’s just not fair. what did i do to displease the gods?… wait. nevermind.
i’m tired. and i’m feeling a little on-edge. so, i’m gonna spend tonight with my family… resting and taking care of some things that need attention.
see you in the morning?
re: “I had visions of me spending the rest of the night trying to convince you it would be ok… “
ok, so i’m starting to panic… a little. and i wish i could promise you that you won’t have to “talk me down” from the ledge before the week is up. and i’m trying really hard NOT to say ‘can’t’ or ‘never’… and now, i have to go clean my house… because i’ve been ignoring my family. and it shows. i will check-in sometime after 8:00pm tonight. promise.
i didn’t hear that ambulance on the way home from work today.
my sincere apologies to the driver of the white honda.
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